Friday, March 2, 2012

How to Be Happier As Caregiver to A Teenager

Are you trying to love your teenager the best way you know how, but all you hear them say is "You just don't understand," "Never mind," or "Why should I tell you, you don't care anyway!"

Caregivers today have to work twice as hard to get their teenager's attention because there are so many other distractions. You have to compete against their friends, the computer, TV., radio, school, a job, homework, and most of all... their attitude.

But even with all the things competing against you for their attention, there are still several ways to find some happiness in being the provider for your next generation.

Always keep in mind, that the happier they are with themselves, the happier you will be with yourself.

Here are 5 Tips to Being a Happier Caregiver to a Teenager:

1. Listen carefully when they talk.

It takes a lot for a teen to come to a parent or caregiver for advice, so once they do, allow them to speak their mind. They may say some things that are shocking or offensive, but don't let that stop you from showing your concern for them and how you value this special time.
For example, if they want to tell you the story of what happen after school today and it gets kind of graphic; just listen to the details and their tone of voice, to determine if they were approving or opposed to the behavior. Remember, they could have gone to anyone else to talk, but they chose you.

2. Give them Challenges to Create Independence

Allow them to make their own arrangements for special events, such as trips to the mall or going to the movies. At the same time, introduce them to the process of opening and maintaining a checking and savings account. Be sure to let them know that it is their responsibility to understand the rules of each account, because they will be responsible to pay all fees that they incur.

3. Give them compliments.

Kind words go along way in a teenager's eyes. Saying you like their haircut or how they handled a bad situation involving one of their friends, helps them to open up to you in ways you could have never imagined.

4. Teach Them How to Appreciate You

Teenagers are not the most sensitive group of people on the planet, but they seem to be the most emotional group. Help them to see that you have feelings too and you hurt just as bad as they do when you have disagreements and debates. Ask them to consider your feelings and emotions, the next time there is a confrontation. Take note to the reaction you get when you ask them to care about your feelings and not just their own. It could make a major difference in your relationship.

5. Teach Them to Live by Faith

The most important thing a caregiver can give a teenager is the guidance to believe in themselves and their Creator. You will know your guidance has paid off when you notice your teenager reading scriptures or proverbs on their own. Let them see you reading your scriptures and following a healthy belief system, so they too can follow a good example. Leading by example is the best thing any caregiver can do.

And now I would like to invite you to claim your FREE Instant Access to 3 Bonus Chapters of my book 31 Ways to Brighten your Days when you visit Antoinette Capri--The CapriiCare Mentor and Founder of Caprii Communications.